


I'll love you every new day

by nightsisterkaris



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-18
Updated: 2019-06-07
Packaged: 2020-01-16 02:28:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18512023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nightsisterkaris/pseuds/nightsisterkaris
Summary: May loses her memory every day. Phil drops out of SHIELD to take care of her.(Heavily inspired by another fanfic I read)





	1. Chapter 1

   ** _(Three months earlier)_**

    _The second Melinda opened her eyes, Phil knew something was wrong._ _"Where am I?!" She growled, adding in some colorful language that Coulson chose to ignore._

   _"You're in the Zephyr's Medical Bay." He answered, relaxing as she sighed, but then frowned. "Who are you?"_

    _"Phil Coulson." He answered in a heartbeat as he grew more confused. "You're probably a little woozy from the meds."_

   _"Meds? What happened? Why am I here? What is 'Zephyr Medical Bay'? I don't know anyone named 'Phil Coulson'." Melinda glared._

_Phil went silent. This has to be the meds. "JEMMAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!" He called, and the young biochemist rushed in. "Whats wrong?" She asked._

  _"I don't know, but something's off with May. She's never reacted this way to meds." Phil told her, and May was frowning at them from the bed. "_ _So what do you think is wrong?" Jemma asked, heading over to May, who tried to pull away until Jemma explained to her that she was Melinda's doctor._

  _"May. . . can't remember anything." Phil told her._

   _"I'm not surprised. Such a concussion can cause temporary or short term memory loss." Jemma said slowly._

   _"You don't understand, Simmons. May doesn't know who_ I  _am. She'd never forget me."_

   _-:x:-_

  _"Is it true?" Daisy asked slowly, coming to stand by her boss, looking at him. He was watching intently as Simmons interviewed May. His brow was furrowed and his blue eyes were fixed on Melinda's form._ _"Yeah. She doesn't remember a thing." Phil sighed. "Jemma's ordered that she get an MRI scan."_

  _"Yikes." Daisy nodded, biting her lip as she observed the director. "You should go." She nodded. "Go get some sleep or something." Phil glanced at her momentarily, and shook his head. "I'm fine."_

    _"You've been sleeping on that crappy cot in the corner for the last week, and I'm pretty sure I saw those sweatpants and tee-shirt yesterday." Daisy countered. "And when was your last meal?" Phil's silence answered for her. Melinda's coma had been hard on everyone. Not because of May directly, but because nobody had been officially running the base for the last week._ _"Yeah, you should go and, uh, shower or something." Daisy pressed her teeth together. "I'll come for you if anything happens."_

_-:x:-_

  _She didn't know what was going on.  "May, I'm going to give you some painkillers now," The woman who claimed to be her doctor, known as_ 'Simmons' _or_ 'Jemma' _, told her._

_Melinda frowned, still panting from the MRI. "I didn't like that," She told Jemma._ _"I'm sure you didn't," Simmons nodded. "MRI's aren't very fun."_

   _Melinda_ humph _ed. "Who was that man? The one who called himself '_ Phil Coulson' _?"  Melinda asked the doctor. Jemma stilled. "He, uh, is a friend of yours."_

_"Really?" Melinda leaned back. "How long?"_

   _"I don't know, but a long time." Jemma shrugged. "Longer then I've been alive."_

_"Why don't I know him?"  May waited for Jemma's slow answer,_ _"You seem to be suffering memory loss." Jemma sighed._

_"Why?" Melinda asked._

  _"There was a terrible accident, and you were injured." Jemma informed her. "You must be tired, because just waking up from a coma and talking immediately is quite exhausting."_

    _"I'm not tired." May argued._

_"I'm looking at you right now," Jemma smirked, "and I just watched you snap your head back up."_

   _Phil leaned on the door, hiding the tears once again as he watched her fall back asleep._

\----- -:x:- -----

 

**(present)**

   Melinda opened her eyes. The blanket was to hot, so she took it off. Slowly sitting up into unfamiliar surroundings, May's hands balled into fists. Her feet touched an unfamiliar floor, and a ragged rug, soft and worn, rested under her toes.

   She crept to the door, and cracked it open. The smell of pancakes and eggs and other wonderful breakfast foods filled her nose and saturated Melinda's senses with her now noticed hunger.

   Discovering a staircase, she descended slowly. Entering a kitchen, she was shocked and horrified to see a strange man cooking at the stove, smiling as he seemed to sense her presence. But it was a sad smile.

   "Hello, Melinda." He turned and introduced himself. "I'm Phil Coulson, and you don't have to be afraid of me."

   "How do I know that?"

   "You haven't killed me yet." He stated matter-of-factly.

   "What?" She retorted, taking him in. Strong arms, and a kind, handsome face with brown hair and deep blue eyes. A warm, home-y look, polo shirt and sweatpants.

   "Search your emotions. Do you feel scared or angry when you see me?"

   "No." Melinda frowned with confusion. "Why would I?"

   "While memory can be lost, your emotions about a memory are not. There-for, you should know deep down that I will not hurt you." Phil Coulson told her. And as Melinda processed his words, she was hit with a wave of realization, gasping as Melinda noticed that he was, indeed, correct. She could not remember anything before waking up five minutes ago.

   Melinda leaned forward and gripped the counter. "Who are you to me?"

   Phil lowers the cooking spoon in his hand. "Thats. . . a very compicated question with a very complicated answer."

   "Are you my husband?" Melinda asked him. She wasn't wearing a ring and neither was her, but she had to be sure.

   "No."

   "A friend?" She waited.

   "A very close friend."  Phil corrected.

   "-with benefits?"

   "No. I would never do that to you without your consent." Phil shook his head.

   "So you want to?" May inquired with an innocent quirk.

   Phil sighed. "Look, I made you - us - breakfast." He referenced to the table, which was set and ready, food waiting, warm in the morning sunlight streaming through the gauzy window curtains.

   "Why do I have no memory?"

   "A terrible accident." Is Phil's vague answer as he sat down on the other side, across from her. "You have a book upstairs on your bedside table that should help." He said cryptically.

   Melinda nodded, sitting down to eat.

\--- -:x:- ---

 

   Picking up the large bound book that Phil had promised would be on her bedside table, Melinda opened it. There were pages after pages of handwriting, and May decided to take it downstairs to read.

   Phil was finishing up dishes, and so Melinda chose a chair in the living room from where she could watch him. Opening the leather cover, Melinda began to read,

_Your name is Melinda Qiaolian May. Your parents are William and Lian May. Your birthday is November 20, 1965, Its 2019 now, so you're 55. You lost your memory in what Phil calls a 'Terrible accident'. He won't tell you more than that._

_But he's also really nice. You ask him if he's your husband every day. But he's not. You've known each other for a really long time. You think he loves you. You care for him a lot._ A lot.

    _Sometimes a girl named_  Daisy Johnson  _comes over to visit you. She always cries and calls you_ 'May'. _Don't be alarmed if she shakes stuff. She has some weird superpower. Daisy also likes to eat cookies. And she teaches you tai chi three o'clock on mondays and thursdays. Apparently you like it._

   _Phil will ask if you want tea at ten, and trust him, he knows how you used to like it. He will probably cry at some point today. It's okay, he just loves you. Coulson also cooks really good. He makes brownies when he's happy. If you want something really tasty, just ask for one of your "favorites" and he'll tear up and get out this handmade cookbook and make something that you will love for supper._

_You like to read and exercise. Here are some notes:_

_\- Don't take a nap, your mind will reset and you will forget today, then wake up badly._

_\- Something REALLY bad happened in Phil's past. He has a big scar on his chest. Also, Never go into the bathroom while he's showering. (That's how you saw it)_

_\- there is chocolate in Phil's shirt drawer, his room is across the hall from yours._

_\- Phil loves hugs and captain america_

_\- you don't like the word "Cavalry" for some reason. Phil won't tell you why._

_\- It's best not to go outside in the morning. Sensory overload._

_\- apparently you can "kick butt like nobody's business" As Daisy says._

_\- Phil talks to much. He respects you though, and will obey literally every request._

_\- Phil likes it when you sit on the same couch as him. He wants to touch your shoulder and hug you but won't without consent. You like it. Touch him too. It helps._

_\- Your mom doesn't know you have chronical long and short-term memory loss._

_\- your dad likes golf?_

_\- You like tea_

_\- Phil likes coffee. You don't._

_\- In no circumstance do you go anywhere new without Phil or Daisy. You will get lost and Phil will panic and yell a lot._

_-Phil calls his red car_ Lola  _and loves it a lot. You are the only one allowed to touch it._

_-If there is anything you remember or find out that is not already here in this book, add it on, because you will forget about it once you sleep._

   Melinda closed her eyes. wow. That's a lot of information to take in. Flipping through the pages, she saw pictures of herself with people she didn't know, and several pictures with notes scrawled all over them about those people. There was one handsome bearded person named  _Grant Ward_  of whom had red marker doodles of blood and gore and guns with the words,  _"YOU HATE HIM"_  in capital letters over his eyes. But everything is in her handwriting. She wrote this down.

   When she was finished, May set the book on the coffee table and leaned back.

   Footsteps sounded softly and suddenly Phil was there with that sad smile and a steaming cup in his hands. "Melinda, do you want tea?" He asked, approaching her. Melinda nodded. Phil set it before her, and Melinda took a sip without a thought. "Thank you." She told him, and Phil smiled.

   The tea was perfect, the right temperature, no sugar or cream, and the blend was nice. "It's perfect." She told him, and Phil broke into a grin.

   "Tell me about yourself." Melinda smiled, the mug warming her hands as she leaned back into the armchair and Phil eased himself down onto the couch. 

   "You always sit in that chair." He mused, and looked up at her. "I'm Phil Coulson. There's not much to tell except I take care of you."

    "Why?"

    "Because you have memory-loss." He answered without hesitation.

   "But why you, and not that Daisy person?" She waited.

   "Because i care a lot about you."

   "You love me?"

   Phil paused. "This is a bad. . . I don't want to freak you out or scare you away, so it's best that I dont answer that-"

   "So you do?"

   "Yes."  Phil coughed.

   "Romantically?"

   "Yes." Phil nodded.

   "Even though I have no memory of you?" May tilted her head.

   "Yes. Its my plan to do this until I die an old man." He answered. "You never gave up on me, so I'll never give up on you." He folded his hands, searching her face for a response.

   May nodded, looking away. "I like you too." Melinda said like a teenager.

   Phil blushed and looked down.

   "Can we have  _'one of my favorites'_  for lunch later?" She asked suddenly. Phil smiled again and confirmed the notebook's entry earlier. "Where are we?" She wondered aloud.

   "Our home." Phil sighed. "In a safe place where we are protected and provided for."

   "What would we have to fear?" May saw the look on his face. Pity, with a large portion of sadness.

   "In our former lives, we racked up quite the list of formidable enemies." He whispered, fearful that he was saying to much.

   "Oh really?" Melinda snorted. "What were we, spies?"

   "You wont' believe me, you never do, but in fact, yes, we were spies." He replied.

   "And that's why Daisy said I was scary?" Melinda asked. Phil's eyes went wide.  She referenced to the book on the coffee table and he relaxed, nodding. The two of them sat in silence until Phil says something about starting lunch.

   Melinda started thinking, and came to the conclusion that she wanted chocolate.

   Looking to check and make sure Phil was busy in the kitchen, she crept upstairs. Stepping lightly over to Phil's bedroom door, she pushed it open. Inside was comfortably messy, with a pair of pants thrown over the footboard of the bed and a book propped open spine-up on the desk chair where a lamp softly lit the corner.  Stalking over to the dresser, Melinda pulled the top one open. Her hand sifted through socks and underwear, so she closed that drawer. The next was his pants. Then finally, the shirt drawer.

   Her hand snaked around until she came across something square and hard. Pulling it out, she saw a shoebox. It was plain brown, but tough and durable, glossed over with varnish to make it shine.

   Opening it, Melinda found out quickly that this was not chocolate. Sighing, she, went back to the drawer, eventually rewarded with a bar of godiva dark chocolate.

   Tearing the foil cover, she opened it and broke off a piece, popping it in her mouth.

   Sitting down on Phil's bedroom floor, May took another look into that shoe box full of papers and trinkets.

   Undoing the first rubber band, she didn't give one thought to the laws of snooping before unfolding the letter,

****************************************

     _Dearest Melinda,_

    _You don't know who I am every morning. You always, without failing, ask me the same question, "Are you my husband?"_

_And every morning it breaks my heart to tell you no. And then explain that, yes, I_ do _love you romantically._

_Once, I answered that question with a "Basically", and you loved me like never before. Your love wa free, trusting, something I'd never experienced before, And I_ loved _it. But when you woke up the next morning in the arms of  a strange man to you, I knew that I could never put that on you again._

_I could never lie to you, because the you of today has not chosen me in that manor._

_But Every morning, even though it's a new you, I can see the Melinda May I knew shine through. So many mannerisms, your voice, your thought process, even your posture and the way you toss your hair is the same. So don't be discouraged, you're still there, just buried, waiting to shine through._

_Every morning is a rewind to the clock, and you are brand new. But I'll never fail to fall in love with the new you every day. I promise this, Melinda, with all my heart. I'm here until the end of the line._

_I can't wait to get to know you today._

_-Your Phil_

   _P.S., and since you're sobbing now,_ and _eating  my chocolate, sitting on the floor, look at the door._

*****************************************

   May read that line with panic, and obeyed. Phil was there, leaning on the door with the tiniest  of smiles tugging at his lips. "Hey, Mel." He whispered.

   May shot up and bolted and to him, Wrapping her arms around Phil's neck. He slowly put his arms around her.

   "How did you know I would be here?" She let another tear fall.

   "You really think this is the only time you've ever come preying on my chocolate?" Phil laughed.

   "You baited me!" She pushed him back. "You just want to trick-!"

   "No, Melinda." Phil shook his head. " _You_  decide, use your brain. I already told you I wouldn't lie to you, so judge me as I stand."

     Melinda realized that she couldn't. He could have just answered any of her questions earlier in a way to lie, but he didn't.

   "You really do love me?" She said.

   "Yes." Phil nodded, taking her hand sheepishly until she slipped it in place against his palm.

   "I like you too." Melinda nodded. "Are you  _'basically'_  my husband?"

   "I'm single."

   "But not when you're with me."

    "I'm yours."

    "You want me as I am?"

    "I do."

    "Then let me get my notebook." She dashed back down stairs and returned in a moment, opening it.

   Phil handed her a pen.

   Melinda took a breath before crossing out part of, " _You ask him if he's your husband every day. But he's not. You've known each other for a really long time. You think he loves you. You care for him a lot. _A lot." 

    Melinda instead replaced it with,  _"But he basically is. And he loves you."_

   She paused before putting on one more line, "And he loves you too."

   That night she planned to see his scar under very different circumstances than the forgotten first time.

\--- -:x:- ---

 

   The next morning, When Melinda rolled over to see a strange man in her bed and asked for his identity, he simply smiled with love in his eyes and answered, 

   "Hi, I'm Phil Coulson. . . your husband."

 

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Melinda believes fully that she is Phil's spouse, and Mack and Elena come for a visit

When Melinda opened her eyes, she realized that she was way too hot. There was a warm weight over her waist, and soft breathing on her forehead. Pushing herself up, Melinda backed up from the unfamiliar form. "Who are you?"

"Hi, I'm Phil Coulson. . . your husband." The man immediately said, opening his eyes. "It's okay. I won't hurt you."

"Why do I not know you?!?!" Melinda sucked in a breath, checking her hand for a ring.

"You have memory loss." He answered sinceriously, letting her go, and allowing her to pull back, careful not to spook the woman before him. This Phil Coulson waited until she was out of bed, unsurprisingly relieved to be fully dressed, and going straight to the open bathroom door. Melinda was pleased to see her toothbrush marked with her name, and towels set out for her as well so that she could take a shower.

Undressing and stepping under the hot spray, Melinda let the water wash away the sleep from her eyes. She could hear Phil in the bedroom, puttering around, and when he poked his head into the bathroom to grab something, Melinda leaned out to stare at him expectedly. Phil was straining to keep his eyes up and to her eyes. Melinda waited.

"Can I help you?" Phil asked sheepishly.

"Are you joining me?"

The little squeak he made was confusing.

"We are married, are we not?" Melinda scrunched her eyebrows.

"I, uh, we, umm, usually don't-" Phil stuttered.

"Why?"

"Do you want too?" He gulped.

Melinda shrugged. "I'm not done." she didn't want to admit she didn't really know what she was doing.

"Okay. . ." he nodded, slowly stepping into the bathroom.

Melinda saw the scar. As soon as he was next to her, she came closer. Running her fingers over the pale raised lines, she hugged him, and her hand had discovered another on his back. It ran right through him. "What happened?" She breathed.

"It's an old wound." He said, his face going red, looking her in the eyes, not venturing to drop his gaze.

"But what happened?" Melinda pushed.

"I got stabbed at work in an accident." He told her.

"What was your job?!?!" Melinda gasped, inhaling steam and warming her lungs with the moisture.

"I was saving the world, of course!" He grinned. Melinda took his hand, studying his blue eyes.

"Yeah right." Melinda smirked.

"What, you don't think I could?" He laughed.

"Maybe." Melinda grabbed the shampoo, following his directions when she realized that she didn't know how to take a shower, lathering her hair then passing the bottle to him. "Why aren't you at work now?"

"I dropped out to take care of you. My employees were quite mad." He mused.

"You were boss?"

"I was in charge of the whole organization."

"And how did this organization end up with you accidentally getting stabbed while saving the world?" she smiled, a hand coming to cover the scar.

"I was an undercover spy." Phil shrugged.

"Uh-huh." Melinda hummed. "Now my husband is a spy." She sang.

Phil laughed, dropping the subject as Melinda rinsed the shampoo from her hair, moving on to the second bottle of what Phil called 'conditioner'. "Can you tell me about myself?" Melinda asked.

"Well, you were always the boss, even if nobody realized it. You've saved my life dozens of times-"

"You do seem like the kind of person to forget to take your meds or something." Melinda interrupted. "And I've only known you for what, about half an hour?"

"Anyway, you're not only insanely hot, but you're also really smart and you're loved by all your friends." Phil added. "There's even more in a notebook on your bedside table."

"Thank you, Phil."

-:x:-

 

With Phil's cheeks still blushing profusely as he made pancakes at the stove, Melinda enjoyed the warm glow she felt as she sat at the table, watching him with fascination. He was gentle and sweet, respecting her and her space, but today she had run the show. Looking up at her husband, Melinda decided that she liked him, Maybe she didn't remember him or her life before this morning, but he made her feel warm and safe, so maybe this situation wasn't as horrible as it seemed.

Sighing as she placed the notebook back beside her plate, Melinda heard soft steps and then Phil was setting a plate of pancakes before her, with all kind of toppings that he assured her she loved. "Believe me, I know you and what you like." he had whispered, smiling.

Soon he too was enjoying pancakes, sitting next to her, and she smiled. He was such a gentleman, understanding that any forward moves might scare her, but Melinda trusted him, and so she was perfectly fine with him touching her, even though he refrained from doing so for some strange reason.

"What's our wedding date?" she suddenly asked, and Phil looked up with slight alarm before stuttering, "May 18th."

"Do we have kids?"

"We were parent figures to some close friends." He stammered.

"Oh." Melinda nodded, stuffing more of her breakfast into her mouth. She sat there, trying to process this. He had explained that she had long term and short term memory loss, and she was a 'new person every day'. Melinda was a clean slate, with nothing there to tell her how to live.

"How long have I been losing my memory?" Melinda asked him.

"Five months, two weeks, and six days." Phil rattled off without a thought.

"What did you mean when you said that I react differently to you every day, when you also said I was the same person?" Melinda stared at him.

"You see these bruises?" Phil pulled down the collar of his shirt and pointed to the splotches around his neck. Melinda nodded, scrunching her eyebrows together in confusion. "I woke up yesterday to you strangling me."

"I. . . I what?" Melinda's mouth fell open.

"You had me in a choke hold, and I had to escape and explain that you were safe." Phil shrugged, letting his shirt fall back.

"I'm so sorry." Melinda gasped, shaking her head.

"It's alright, you didn't know what you were doing." Phil smiled, noticing that she had finished her breakfast, he took her plate to the sink, washing it for her and returning to eat the remaining bites of his own pancakes. "And if you're up for it, one of those close friends wants to visit you today, I thought that since today was one of your better days, I called Mack and Elena and gave them a heads-up."

Melinda considered this. Something bothered her about this. She didn't like the idea of sharing Phil. she could hardly fathom other people, even something told her -intuition maybe- that she was not alone in her world.

"Unless you don't want to."

"I do want to." Melinda told him. "I want to see another person."

-:x:-

 

"Why is. . . why is his skin so dark?" Melinda asked Phil.

"Mack is african-american." Coulson burst out laughing. "I have to remind myself every single time someone visits that you and I are the only people you've ever seen every day."

"Oh, okay." Melinda smiled, watching out the window as she sat leaning on the glass, her hands on the clear barrier that separates her from the warm sunlight.

Soon the doorbell rings and Phil goes, and soon the tall man and his companion that Phil had called 'Elena' were inside the house. Melinda tried to smile, soon sneaking behind Phil. "Hi. I'm Melinda, his wife."

Mack and Elena freeze. "Wife?" Elena echoes.

"Yeah, Mack, Elena, this is Melinda, my wife." Phil has an almost warning tone to his voice as he puts his arm around Melinda. 

"That's wonderful!" Mack claps Phil on the back on the way inside. Elena flashes a smile at Melinda. "Hey May, how's it been?"

"I don't know." Melinda bites her lip, looking downwards. "I woke up only four hours ago."

"I see." Elena nods. "I have missed you."

"Thank you?" Melinda blinks. She has no memory. She can't return the favor. There is an awkward silence before Phil leads them into the kitchen and starts another pot of tea, and he and Mack begin planning lunch. "Do you know Daisy?" Melinda ventures.

"Oh yes!" Elena laughs, clear and loud. Mack smiles at the sound. "She misses you as well. How. . . how do you know-"

"My notebook." Melinda answers quickly, noticing the book still on the table, she leans over and grabs it, flipping the pages until she points to the passage about Daisy. Elena reads over her shoulder until Melinda also shows the woman the photo of Elena herself, notes scribbled around the photograph.

Elena tears up as she reads.

"Wow, uh, Melinda, this is amazing." 

"It's everything I know, and everything Phil says I can know."

"Everything he says you can- oh." Elena sighes.

"I don't know what he could be hiding from me." Melinda tells her, closing the book and setting it back on the table.

"Just, some past trauma." Elena forces a smile and Phil comes out with the tea. 

"Mint for the ladies?" He smiles, setting the tray on the table and Elena and Melinda smile their thanks.

Melinda watches as Elena sitts down, then follows Phil, stopping him. "What is it, Melinda?" He asks softly, concerned. "Did. . . did you or I ever fall in love before we married?"

"Yes." Phil nodded.

"And did it end badly?"

Phil looks down and kisses her on the forehead and tells her, "It never ended."


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> May gets her memory back

 

     "Hi, I'm Phil Coulson. . . your husband." The man said, a calming look on his face. He was still sleepy, blue eyes not fully awake. But his arm around her was strong and sure, strangely familiar. "It's okay, Melinda. You don't have to be afraid of me."

   "How. . . Who. . . Why?" Melinda stammered, pulling away, and tugging the blanket to cover herself as she sat up.

   "I promise, you're safe. You might be scared, and that's okay. You have long and short-term memory loss." He seemed honest enough.

    "Then how do I know you're really my husband?" She hissed, taking the sheet with her as Melinda climbed out of bed.

   "Look in your notebook." Phil told her. "You wrote it yourself."

   Melinda looked to her bedside table, and grabbed the leather bound book there and checked. He was right. Right there on the page, it said that this man loved her and was her husband.

    "What happened to me?" Melinda backed up.

   "A terrible accident." He sighed sadly, a pained look on his face.  Phil rolled over and propped his head up on his hands. He looked her in the eyes and said softly, "Go and get ready, use the bathroom or something. You can read that book during breakfast."

   Melinda obeyed. It felt right.

\--- -:x:- ---

 

   It was smack in the middle of an awkward meal that the knock came on the door.

   Phil was quick to get up and answer it, opening the door to reveal two young women. One was a pretty brunette with big brown eyes and wavy hair. The other was of asian decent, darker waves and a leather jacket slung over her shoulders.

   "Sir!" The first woman cried with joy, reaching out to hug Phil. "We have something for May!"

   "What?" Phil stilled, and Melinda panicked. _New people_. New people she didn't know. There were new people invading the only world she knew; this house. Standing up abruptly, and stared at the two women before making brief eye-contact with the asian one and then it was to much, just too much for her brain to process and she was running, bolting up the stairs and down the hall to the first place she thought she knew.

   Phil was calling her back but she had already dove under the covers of that familiar bed and was shutting out the world. Her heart was beating faster than she thought possible, and her world was crashing down but she didn't know  _why_.

    Footsteps calmly made their way up the stairs and to the door, where she heard someone slowly come into the bedroom. "Melinda?" Phil's voice softly ventured.

   She replied with a whimper, "Send them away!"

   "It's just Daisy and Jemma. They won't hurt you." Phil promised, crossing the floor and coming to sit next to her buried form on the bed.

   "Are you sure?" Melinda sighed, pulling down the blanket to peek at him.

   Phil nodded with a smile. "They think they can help your brain." He whispered. "They only want to help. Do you remember reading about Daisy?" 

   Melinda nodded. 

   "Come out, it's okay, I promise."

   Melinda slowly sat up, pulling her knees to her chest and wrapping her arms around them. "I. . . I don't even know-" She broke down with sobbs. "I'm sorry, I didn't know who they were, and-" Melinda buried her face in her hands. Suddenly, arms wrapped around her, hot tears trailing down her cheeks and soaking into the sleeves that covered the strong arms that engulfed her tiny form. Phil whispered to her that it was okay, his hand coming up to touch her hair.

   Melinda realized that he was crying to, holding her close and tucking her under his chin, safe from the unknown.

  --- -:x:- ---

 

   "Should we. . . ?" Daisy looked around the kitchen, barely able to hear the almost inaudible sobs reverberating through the house.

    "No. May is probably having an anxiety attack from sensory overload." Jemma said, shaking her head. "And May needs a safe-place right now."

   "Why would she have an anxiety attack?" Daisy frowned with concern.

   "Think, Daisy. Her entire world so far has been Coulson and this house. Then we invade it. We were new and out of place."

    "Oh." Daisy nods.

   "Think of the bedroom or Coulson as her castle, so-to-speak. She needs a stronghold that we can't break into." Jemma adds. "So we should wait down here until she's ready."

    --- -:x:- ---

 

   Finally, Melinda was ready. Slowly following Phil back down the stairs, almost hiding behind her, she was relieved to see that Daisy and Jemma were waiting in a calm manner, and speaking softly to introduce themselves.

   They explained that there was a device called the "Memory Machine" that read brain waves on a subconscious level and made them more readable. 

   Phil seemed to not like this idea, his jaw tightening, eyes steely and glaring. "No." He said sternly. "That machine is unpredictable." He began to argue with the two women, almost forgetting that May herself was there.

   "But it might work! What more do you have to lose?!?!" Daisy argued. "You've been here for two years taking care of May, and you've been lying to her for the last year and a half!"

   "Lying to me?" May quirked up. "What?" Daisy didn't hear her.

   "You really want to live another day telling her that she is your wife?!?!?" Daisy retorted. "You've been telling her that for eighteen months now!"

   "I. . . I'm not your wife?" May's lips parted and she looked at the man before her.

   "We never  _actually_  got married." He said, glaring daggers at Daisy. "One day you knew how much I loved you, and wrote that in your notebook." He was breathing harder. "So then you decided that you wanted to wake up every morning my wife, and you  _told_  me to tell you I was your husband."

   "And what  _else_  are you hiding?" Melinda folded her arms. "Why can't I at least try to get my memories back?!?"

   "BECAUSE YOU'RE  _HAPPY!!_ " Phil exploded, his hands in fists. "You're  _happier_  this way." He shook.

   "You think you're doing me a favor?" Melinda trembled. "By hiding whatever I was like before,  _this_?"

   Phil's fist connected with the doorframe. "No. I think. . . I think. . ." He sighed. "I think you aren't strong enough."

   "You said I was the strongest person you knew."

   "That was before-"

   "You said that I was the same person on the inside." Melinda was cracking, the only world she knew was collapsing under her and Melinda was holding on with all she had left.

   Phil was about to cry, his own face contorting with pain. "I love you to much to let you do this."

   "Then you don't know me." She shook her head, "you just want to stay here where you can lie to me day after day after day, getting free love that comes with my blind trust!" Melinda screamed. "I'm blind! I don't know  _anything_ , so how am I supposed to know you love  _me?!?!"_

   Phil reached out and grabbed her, lightly holding her shoulders. "I love you because you mean everything to me, Melinda!  _Everything_! You're my world, so I'm happy to be yours  _every. Single.  New. Day!"_

   "Let go of me." Melinda growled.

   Phil did, his heart shattering.

   Melinda turned to the two cowering women in the corner. "Take me to this Brain scanning Memory Machine."

\--- -:x:- ---

 

   Melinda was laying down on this table, still a little freaked out from the car ride. Luckly, Daisy and Jemma had thought of her, and the windows were beyond tinted, almost black. Phil had come, even though the ride was tense.

   Melinda closed her eyes as Jemma strapped her down, narrating every action.   

   Eventually a slow blue light shone dully behind her eyelids, and a sofy hum and buzz filled the air. She emptied her mind, and considering that she only had today's memories, that wasn't to hard.

   _Suddenly, it came. First the emotions, Dread fear, Happiness, Pain, Heartbreak, Pleasure, Hurt, Offence, Joy, Apprehension, Nervousness, Excitement. They were all mixing into this mass that swirled and soared through her veins._

   _Then light and sound. They began to pair up with their emotions and then, then came the names and events._

_Bahrain, Phil Coulson, Glasgow, Natasha Romanoff, The Hub, Home, Lian and William May, Andrew Garner, Grant Ward, Russia, Nick Fury, Teachers and trainers, loved ones, Daisy Johnson, Afterlife, Inhumans, Pain, Guns, FitzSimmons, Bombs, 0-8-4s, Loki, TAHITI, Partners, HYDRA, torture, Pain, Haig, Forbidden love, Audrey Nathan, Rosalind Price, Jealousy, Trust, and so much Pain._

   "Get her out!!!!!" Phil's scream pierced the darkness she was sinking into, grabbing her and pulling her up, up into the memories again. Day after day after of day of innocence, not knowing the horrors she had survived and performed. Day after day after day of confusion about her world and what would happen. Day after day after of day of being a clean slate.

   Day after day after of day of  _Phil Coulson_ , never ever giving up.

   Her eyes shot open and he was over her, everything having ended in one abrupt jerk out of the dreamscape. 

   "Melinda." His eyes were frantic, searching her. "Don't be insane, please. I can't handle that."

   "Who are you?" She said slowly.

    The look on his face crushed her heart, but her smile wiped it away and his look of shock at such a cruel joke was soon replaced with pure joy, tears pooling in his eyes and he leaned down and kissed her on the lips.

   "Ew." Daisy remarked from the corner. " _That's_ really _gross_."

   "Shut up." Jemma said.

   "Is _all_ of you here?" Phil begged.

   "Yeah." May choked. 

   "Does that mean we're still. . ."

   "Married? Hell yes."

 


End file.
